hillgaze
verb
To contemplate irrevocable abandonment of something significant in order to find something better.
Katerina had been with Easton for a long time - since high school. But lately she’d been wondering just how good their relationship actually was - she had no real basis for comparison. Was Easton holding her back? Was she settling? Should she be? She didn’t know, so she found herself spending more and more time hillgazing, considering cutting the cord and striking out alone.